Sex Tips

It’s Not a Bore: How to Make Missionary Sex More Magical

You may have heard of missionary sex before. Missionary has become a staple over the years as a go-to sex position for casual flings and romantic relationships alike. If you’ve seen a sex scene on television or in the movies, it’s more than likely you saw the actors mimicking the missionary sex position.

The term “missionary sex” rose to the forefront of mainstream culture in the 1960s and 1970s. That came along with mythical origin stories about religious missionaries teaching various cultures that “man-on-top” intercourse was the dominant manner by which procreation should occur.

Yet despite its fantastical origin stories, resonance within pop culture, and general prominence, missionary is a bit of a polarizing sex position. While some people may regard missionary sex as a tried-and-true position, others might consider it boring or vanilla. But there are always strategies you can try to mix things up and make missionary sex more enticing—for both you and your partner!

What is the Missionary Sex Position?

In its classical form, the missionary sex position is when the penetrating partner is on top of the receiving partner, who is often lying flat on their back. So, for penis-in-vagina sex, the person with the penis is doing the penetrating while the person with the vulva is receiving from their back.

People of any gender, non-binary people, and folks of all sexual orientations can have missionary sex. For example, two women or people with vulvas may have missionary sex (though it may look slightly modified) by scissoring or using a strap-on. Straight, gay, poly… missionary sex is standard practice for all sexual partners.

But … there are numerous reasons why everybody should like missionary sex!

What Are the Benefits of Missionary Sex?

Sex should be about pleasure, and there are multiple pleasure benefits the missionary sex position can offer. Let’s get into them now, shall we:

Easy to learn: One of the more straightforward positives with the missionary sex position lies in how easy it is to learn and modify. If you’re preparing to have sex for the first time, missionary is the position to start with and makes for a natural progression from foreplay to sexual intercourse.

Physical closeness: Sure, you might like the view of your partner’s backside during doggy style sex. But do you sometimes want a position that allows you to look deeper into your partner’s eyes? Missionary sex lets you engage in eye contact while also bringing you physically closer to your partner, making it easier to kiss their lips or their neck while you penetrate. That also means it’s easier to whisper sweet nothings in your partner’s ear and communicate with them whenever you want to change things up, whether that’s trying a new position or mixing up the speed.

Deep penetration: While cowgirl and doggy style might offer tighter contact and potentially greater G-spot stimulation, you can still give and take it deep with missionary sex. And for penis-in-vagina sex, the missionary position is more conducive to rubbing the clitoris during penetration, which may help the receiving partner get that much closer to orgasm.

Great for dom-sub play: Missionary sex is an ideal position for people who have a dominant-submissive (dom-sub) sexual relationship. Maybe the submissive partner likes getting tied up for some kinky action. Just remember, as with any sexual encounter, make sure all parties consent to any sort of dom-sub play.

More Intimacy: You don’t need to have boundless energy or hump hard to enjoy missionary sex. Clitoral stimulation can happen with some simple thrusting during penis-in-vagina sex. Missionary sex allows you to take things slow (if you choose), share gentle or passionate kisses, and really appreciate all of your partner’s features.

Missionary-style sex offers a lot of physical and emotional benefits. And if you still think it’s a boring position, we’ve got some ideas on how to amp things up!

How to Have Better Missionary Sex

So, the missionary sex position doesn’t turn you on, huh? Or are you uncertain it’s the best position suited to your sex needs? Let’s see if we can help you maximize the pleasure and bring the missionary sex position back to the top of your “favorites” list. Here are some tips for how to have better missionary-style sex:

Work your way into it: Sure, sometimes the heat of the moment strikes, and you and your partner want to jump right into intercourse. But that also may partially explain why missionary sex merely feels like a monotonous “starting point.” So, instead of rushing into things, be very intentional with foreplay—including touching and dirty talk. And mix in the oral sex. Licking and kissing those sensitive areas can help stimulate you and your partner and get you both all revved up for intercourse.

Use lube: Lube can help to decrease the friction you may sometimes feel during sexual intercourse, and that reduced friction can help amplify the pleasure. Try a lube with heating or cooling sensations, like Trojan™ Arouses & Intensifies. Or go for a long-lasting and silky-smooth lubricant, such as Trojan™ Infinite Glide™.

Explore the erogenous zones: We talked about touching and kissing different areas during foreplay. But you should continue that touching and kissing during intercourse, as well! Since missionary is a sex position that offers unparalleled closeness, you should take advantage by playing with your partner’s nipples, around their neck, or in between their thighs.

Go with a textured condom: You want to stay protected and use a condom when you’re having intercourse. But you still want to do everything you can to maximize the pleasure during missionary sex, and you can also do so from a product perspective. Textured condoms—including those of the studded and ribbed variety—can help provide added stimulation, particularly for the partner being penetrated. Try a textured Trojan™ condom, like Trojan™ BareSkin™ Studded Condoms or Trojan™ Ultra Ribbed Condoms.

Try different tempos: Yes, missionary style sex can be more intimate or “lazy.” But increasing the speed and intensity is a surefire way to add some sexy variety to the classic position. You might even kick things up a notch if your partner tells you they’re getting close to the point of orgasm—or if you are getting indications a climax is coming.

Shift your body position: Instead of being chest to chest, try moving your bodies so that the chest of the penetrating partner is closer to the shoulders of the receiving partner. Additionally, the receiving partner should bend their legs 45 degrees to tilt the hips up. This is called the Coital Alignment Technique, and it’s a good way to maintain consistent contact with the clitoris during penis-in-vagina sex.

Experiment with sex toys: A little extra vibration doesn’t hurt when it comes to the missionary position. Using sex toys with a partner isn’t just fun, but also occasionally necessary. Not everyone has a large or girthy penis size, and that’s perfectly OK! Sex toys can help provide added clitoral or other genital stimulation during penetration to help maximize the chance of orgasm in the missionary sex position. Try the Trojan™ Dual Pleasure Vibrating Wand, which offers both a 2-in-1 vibrator for the vulva and a vibrating ring for people with a penis.

In addition to some of these tips, you and your partner should also figure out which angles you like best during missionary sex! With that in mind, you might try different variations of the position.

Missionary Style Sex Positions to Try

We don’t always want “classic” or “standard” in the bedroom, do we? Sex is explorative, and that urge to do something new can perk up from time to time. Instead of always resorting to the “one partner on top of the other,” try some of these missionary sex position variations for experimentation or simply a welcome change of pace.

Legs Up

This variation of the missionary sex position involves the receiving partner lifting their legs either to the side of the penetrating partner’s shoulders or on the shoulders themselves. The angle allows for deeper penetration. Plus, it may afford the penetrating partner more room to push back a little bit so they can really give the receiver every inch during penetrative sex. The receiving partner might also consider wrapping their legs around the penetrating partner’s torso—this is sometimes called pretzel missionary sex.

Mounted Missionary Sex

If you’re feeling a bit lazy or don’t want to lift your legs during missionary sex, then mounted missionary may be the position for you. The receiving partner places a pillow or cushion under the hips, which helps change the angle of penetration and can grant the penetrating partner easier access to clitoral stimulation. Or, if you’re not on the bed, you might also use a counter or table as a “mount” to change the angle of penetration.

The Anvil

“Anvil” is similar to the legs up and mounted missionary sex positions. The difference is that the receiving partner’s legs are lifted so that their feet rest on the penetrating partner’s shoulders and their thighs are pressed against the stomach. The position creates leverage for penetration and may be ideal for hitting the G-spot during penis-in-vagina sex. It’s also a great option if you and your partner are exploring anal sex.

The Spork

Here’s a take on the missionary sex position that closely resembles side sex, although the penetrating partner still moves on top. The receiving partner lies on their back and lifts one of their legs while the penetrating partner moves their own body at a 90-degree angle between the receiver’s legs. This is more of a relaxed variation of missionary sex that is also easily adjustable to find the perfect angle.

Standing Missionary Sex

You don’t necessarily have to take missionary lying down! OK, maybe that was said slightly tongue in cheek, but standing missionary sex is a great way to try something new and explore more athletic sexual movements. This position may take some maneuvering, and you should use a wall or some other surface for security. Still, standing missionary provides a different, more upward angle for penetration—which your partner may find preferable for proper stimulation!

Reverse Missionary Sex

Here’s a big spin on the classic missionary sex position. The reverse missionary sex position involves the penetrating partner lying on their back and spreading their legs. The receiving partner then positions themselves to straddle the penetrating partner as if you were trying the cowgirl position, with the receiver grinding and putting in the work to essentially penetrate themselves. This might afford the penetrating partner a chance to rest and let the receiving partner partake in some pumping and thrusting.

Make Missionary Sex More Magical

Now you know some tips and tricks to help eliminate some of the monotony of missionary sex and help make it a sexy and explosive position, whenever the mood strikes! Add some of these positions or tips to your sex bucket list and get ready to shake your partner to the core. And of course, make sure you stay protected by choosing the Trojan™ condom that fits you best and feels great.